aLexZiipiiT
Keeps Gettin' BetterArchive for January, 2010
How Can I Ask You Not To Walk Away If You Already Did…?
This past weeks almost killed me, I got sick and had a lot of pressure because of some tests that I cannot fail, on top of that was the wrong wrong wrong thing that I started to drain my mind just thinking about Oscar and the past…
I hate the fact that I tell myself to just forget him and move on but at some point I just go back to the point of breaking down so easily!
Yesterday I stayed home most of the day and for some reason I decided to clean up my room and while doing that, I found this print of Oscar’s hand that he made for me with white glue and also, I found stuff that I just never gave him for a reason or another, a letter, a little draw, a 3-D dog made with cardboard etc…
I started reading the letter and teardrops came out of my eyes because of everything I wrote, I wrote stuff that I would not be able to tell him at this point and it was just hard to remember all the things that happened between us…the things that were not supposed to happen, the bad things..
I feel totally lost without his smile… Everytime I remember him it’s so weird because we were so perfect together.. everything just shattered in like 2 seconds and after that, he forgot about me in like 5 seconds.. that was hurtful..
Why is it so hard for me to move on? why do I keep going back to the point of missing him and feel like Im not enough for him?
I remember one comment he left here in my blog saying he would never leave me… how sad… Im breaking down.
One Year Ago [When I Found You]
Download: Undiscovered.mp3?772.58614556261
One year ago…
One year ago I met this amazing guy named Oscar… Yes, it’s been one year.
Since then, I fell in love and things never worked out.. it’s really sad that two months ago I had to walk away, I walked away because I was going nowhere, everything I tried never worked.. everything I said never counted.. and the person that I knew, was no longer there, the person on the other side was starting to lie thinking of no one but himself.. I couldn’t keep things that way, I was left out with no chance to go back in so the right thing was to keep my feelings in a box in the back of my heart to be able to keep going my way.
I walked away knowing he still had some feelings for me… now I wonder if he ever thinks of me because he seems so careless..
Two months after, I still remember our good moments and smile.. I guess it was too good to be true.
Someday I will stop loving you… and you will know it because the grass will turn blue.
I ♥ U
